Mia has taken to hitting. She is easily frustrated, and her short fuse makes her lash out. Our Occupational Therapist taught me to hold her hands down and count to ten. Then I say to Mia "nice hands, no hitting". Mia knows the routine and will often smile for the duration of the countdown. Her amusement is unsettling.

I've noticed that she will often look me in the eye and smile before slapping me in the face. She does it to get a rise out of me. The confusing part is she is so reluctant to look anyone in the eye unless she is misbehaving. She tests me, she knows what I want out of her and maybe if she gives me the eye contact she can be disobedient in other ways.

She hits other people too. I've been told that she has even bitten one of her teachers at school. When I hear of her lashing out against others, I kneel down and sternly say to her, "Mia, you do not hit people" I don't know how much she understands when I talk to her. I think she knows that and uses it to her advantage. When we were training our dog, we were told you shouldn't punish for actions that you didn't witness because they won't know what they're in trouble for. I think about that when I get mad at Mia for things that happened hours ago.

We don't spank her. I used to think that aggression in children was a result of being shown aggression from their parents. I don't believe that anymore. I guess hitting is just programmed into all of us through fight or flight. All I can do is punish what I see and hope it's a phase.